David has an appointment at the Shriner's Hospital on September 19, 2008, at 1:15, for his hand. I called for this appointment two weeks ago! Yikes! I will need help going forward to learn how to teach him things like tieing his shoes, or dealing with the social issues that may come up. Otherwise, he uses his hand as if nothing was wrong with it, and accepts its limitations.
David goes outside and plays in the back yard, asking "Where's David?" He can say his name the right way now: day-vfid...it's just more refinement going forward. Oh, and he says ffffingers now. No more ngingers...
David can answer questions such as where or what or who but not why or how. He's more concrete than conceptual, able to handle responses that deal with nouns, or the physical world, but not process or chain of events. I've said before that he does have a concept of time, but I'm not sure how refined it is. I tell him half an hour, an hour, a while, a little while, which is distinguishable from "a big while". He can communicate a list of things, like the animals at the zoo.
David has names for the chairs in the living room: daddy's couch, mimi's chair, mommy's chair. It's interesting to note that he hasn't seen Amanda sit in that chair for almost 6 months now (or even longer), yet he has had a concept of it long before he could communicate that the chair had ownership, or that he knew that mommy always sat there. Now that he can communicate it, he does. It's been in his mind for quite some time.
Lately, we are spending more time at the park, where I play the troll under the bridge. David likes it when he's standing over my head, and I chase him to the slide...this on the playground equipment at the various parks. He likes to scream! At home, David hides under the table and says he's a ghost sometimes. Sometimes, he puts his blanket (bwankie, bud-dy) over his head, and says, "I'm a ghost!" Other times, he's afraid of monsters. It's cute because he's playing like he's scared. "Scerry" he says. He even fake trembles for good effect.
Yesterday, he didn't want the TV on, so I asked him if I could put on music instead. He got so excited when the music started! He says, "Dance me!" His version of us dancing is just running around touching things, like the mirror in my bedroom, or the closet door in the hallway. I'm also seeing that is beginning to touch walls or whatever it is we're near, like kids do...he touches them as we walk along. He does this in the house, or when we're outside walking along...I guess what I'm noticing is that this is a kid behavior, not a toddler behavior.
And his body is changing, too. He's going from physically feeling like a toddler more into a little boy. His legs feel thicker and sturdier, his torso is more robust. I remember having to hold him in the right position so his body was straight enough to burp him, and now he burps and tells me about it! "Burbping, daddy!" He's so much more independent.
We had two wonderfully idyllic days this week, when everything was just perfect: the weather, the day...David and I both in good moods, full of energy...we got some chores done (David helped!), and played some, ate some, and went off to work and babysitter without much complaint. It's hard on days like that to go to work...
Amanda had David for Memorial Day weekend, so I don't have a lot to report, except that I'm sure a good time was had by all.
I hope your week can be idyllic, even if for a little while.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Energy!
I have energy again! I can do things like laundry, and the dishes, and still have time to play with David, and make hot tea! This is a very happy occurrence. And it's a beautiful day, so I have the windows open. David's outside and playing in the back yard, asking "Where's David?" He can say his name the right way now: day-vfid...it's just more refinement going forward. Oh, and he says ffffingers now. No more ngingers...
Matt and Virginia dropped off David the other day. Matt says he can't see David more than his mother does. How pathetic. Another excuse to not see the boy. "The emotions are too raw right now," he says. You know what? Fuck that. Your fucking emotions are more important than seeing your grandson? He asks, "Do you understand?" No. I do respect it, though, because what else can I do? I can't force you to do anything. I see where Amanda gets it from, though. Avoidance is the best choice!!! There's nothing better! OMG!!! If it's too emotionally difficult, just avoid it, and everything will be okay. I was ready to slog through the hardest parts of being married, but she wasn't. She avoided the hardest parts of raising Colleen, which is why I inherited such a mess in that girl. At least I helped reset some of her direction, and things will be better for her going forward, I hope anyway.
My emotions are raw, too, but I can talk to Amanda and be civil. I can do what needs to be done no matter how I feel. This isn't all about me. But then again, it would seem that Matt and Amanda think it is all about them. You do what you have to do, but don't forget blood is thicker than water, family matters, no matter how it's composed. David had better do something really fucking awful for me not to have contact with him. Or with his kids one day. David's done nothing wrong.
I know kids have distant relationships with their relatives, but this is a bit too much.
Matt and Virginia dropped off David the other day. Matt says he can't see David more than his mother does. How pathetic. Another excuse to not see the boy. "The emotions are too raw right now," he says. You know what? Fuck that. Your fucking emotions are more important than seeing your grandson? He asks, "Do you understand?" No. I do respect it, though, because what else can I do? I can't force you to do anything. I see where Amanda gets it from, though. Avoidance is the best choice!!! There's nothing better! OMG!!! If it's too emotionally difficult, just avoid it, and everything will be okay. I was ready to slog through the hardest parts of being married, but she wasn't. She avoided the hardest parts of raising Colleen, which is why I inherited such a mess in that girl. At least I helped reset some of her direction, and things will be better for her going forward, I hope anyway.
My emotions are raw, too, but I can talk to Amanda and be civil. I can do what needs to be done no matter how I feel. This isn't all about me. But then again, it would seem that Matt and Amanda think it is all about them. You do what you have to do, but don't forget blood is thicker than water, family matters, no matter how it's composed. David had better do something really fucking awful for me not to have contact with him. Or with his kids one day. David's done nothing wrong.
I know kids have distant relationships with their relatives, but this is a bit too much.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Bad Dad Guilt!
Amanda has David for 2 days and discovers that the reason Davids left earlobe is scabbed where it connects to his head is because his shirts are too small...I would never have thought of that. They seem to fit in every other way, as in they're not too short, or too tight, or anything like that. It's only when removing the shirt over his head that it causes this problem. I don't know why I didn't think that to be a big problem. But now I feel guilty that I missed it, or didn't think it to be a big deal.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Our latest library trip
So we go the library. I don't think David knows what he's agreeing to when he says Yes, but because he agrees, we go. (This is for story time at the library.) "Will you sit still?" Yes. He sat for 2 minutes, then was playing again. I got so mad. Finally I took him back to the car and really yelled at him because he wouldn't sit still! He did not take it well. But when we got home, he sat still and we read four books! It looks like I'm going to have to really start to get stricter with him if I want any results. He can't continue like this. It won't work for his future!
Reality Check Part II
Amanda is a good check on me as a parent. Things I let go, she doesn't. David's left ear has a scab that won't heal, but I don't know what caused it to get cut in the first place, or what it was that broke the skin. I let that go, because it's not infected, and not getting worse, I figure it will heal on its own, no big deal. Of course, Amanda just looked at me like I'm a bad parent. And I want to do better for David, so maybe I should go to the doc about it? It's like that with other things, too, but nothing I can think of at the moment. But she does, and has, make/made me a better person, and parent. So I will get this done for David.
Reality Check: Can't Relocate!
Posted on BBC:
Sigh. While I haven't been offered a job in NH, before they even will interview me, I have to be able to be willing to move to NH. I am certainly willing, but XW is telling me that she will want to flip our custody arrangement so that she'll have DS with her in MO, rather than me have him in NH. Our divorce decree states that I won't leave FL, where I currently am...I wish I had thought of this possibility when we went for mediation. I never thought I'd leave FL...
So, do I just sigh at the opportunity lost, do I go to court over this, or let her have him and me go to NH if I get the job? Ugh.
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I was really dumb about this part of the agreement when we were in mediation. I never CONSIDERED even leaving FL at the time, but now, it's way too small of a state!
I'm not going to give her my DS...that is for 200% sure. I'm think I'm going to send a note to my lawyer and ask how much it might cost to get that provision changed...
Sigh.
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Okay, points in favor of her argument: she says that DS should be close to extended family. I have no counter-argument there. Or do I? I do have my mother and my sister and herbrats kids close. Of course, if he were up there, then the closest any of her extended family are is 2 hours plus drive away. Not much better than a plane trip, huh? Sigh. If she had him, he'd at least be with his sister...
PS I sent a letter to my lawyer asking how much it will cost to try to get that changed, whether I get this job or not...
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Well, we discussed me moving out of state before, and she said no. I just need to push the issue. I'm not so worried about getting the job, or feeling like my bubble is burst because of her objection. It's something that's always in the back of my mind.
I am pretty open with her, no doubt. And she is so not open with me. I know very little of what happened with David while he was with her, and she doesn't have any digital pictures of him to send, and I doubt I'll ever see the analog ones that you take w/ 35mm film. It's very frustrating.
Thank you for caring about me, it means a lot. I keep her informed because it's the right thing to do. I wouldn't say we have a supportive relationship, because she said this in an email (quoth the raven):
You are stuck in florida until he's 18 unless you give me custody.
She doesn't really make demands on me, because she really can't. Since we figured out that our marriage was over, my best interests were never at heart, and lately I'm wondering if she cares about DS...I did not lay down and die in spite of how bad she was to me before she left. She was very surprised by my ability to stand up and withstand her horribleness, because I'm usually like a reed in the wind...
Because of the blatant-ness of the above statement, I contact my lawyer, and asked how much this will cost to get this one thing changed, and what the repurcussions will be. I have a back-up plan in case she stops paying CS...(she's been voluntarily unemployed since leaving Tampa), my main worry about opening up this can of worms...but we'll see what happens...
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The only reason I have David 95% of the time is because she chose to leave FL, and relocate to MO. State law says she can't take him with her, because that deprives me of my rights as a parent. Had she stayed here we would have had him 50/50.
It's my fault about me having to stay in FL, because that was part of our mediation. I never thought I'd leave, or want to leave, FL. It was not a big deal to me at the time. Now a bad decision is really biting me in the butt. She thinks that had she stayed, she would have primary custody. Je pense que non!
I'm in Florida because this is where I was born and raised. I'm here by default, I suppose. I have some other connections, but extended family doesn't really determine where I live, in this case, my mom and my sister. And doesn't really have anything to do with it, it's just bluster from her. But David is with me because I wanted him! And obviously, Amanda wanted her bf and seasons that you get in MO. There's not really seasons here in FL...David's going to have to live with that rejection for his whole life. I can hear her thought process, "Hmm...is it more important to be with my son, or the seasons and my bf? Easy choice!" Just amazing.
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Today, in "Relocation Hospital", we have our protagonist, Mr. Rusty, who spoke with Dr. Atty, about his prospects for the future. Dr. Atty says that it's going to be a difficult procedure. The extraction requires an "Intent to relocate" procedure, that Dr. Atty will help with. The cost is undetermined, since it's possible that the disease will fight, and more surgeries will be needed. (Cue 50's style pipe organ music)
Okay, that was fun. The atty says I have to file some forms, etc, and given what I know about the ex, she will fight it. I informed her of this change because she's going to find out anyway...I have no intention of giving the boy up to her. If I'd had my way, I would have kept her DD, too... Anyway...I share highlights of achievements, accomplishments, changes, but not things like "Lost my temper" or "Due to my negligence..." I've been telling him that I love him so much since yesterday. She won't get him...if I can't leave FL, I can't. It's pretty crappy, but it's my own stupidity that did it. Lately I wonder if she'll move back down here just to keep me from moving. Wouldn't that be sweet! It would be bad for me, but good for the boy, and bad for the ex...so I'm not sure about that now that I think of it.
I will not be the one who has to explain to him why I left him. She will.
Sigh. While I haven't been offered a job in NH, before they even will interview me, I have to be able to be willing to move to NH. I am certainly willing, but XW is telling me that she will want to flip our custody arrangement so that she'll have DS with her in MO, rather than me have him in NH. Our divorce decree states that I won't leave FL, where I currently am...I wish I had thought of this possibility when we went for mediation. I never thought I'd leave FL...
So, do I just sigh at the opportunity lost, do I go to court over this, or let her have him and me go to NH if I get the job? Ugh.
-----
I was really dumb about this part of the agreement when we were in mediation. I never CONSIDERED even leaving FL at the time, but now, it's way too small of a state!
I'm not going to give her my DS...that is for 200% sure. I'm think I'm going to send a note to my lawyer and ask how much it might cost to get that provision changed...
Sigh.
-----
Okay, points in favor of her argument: she says that DS should be close to extended family. I have no counter-argument there. Or do I? I do have my mother and my sister and her
PS I sent a letter to my lawyer asking how much it will cost to try to get that changed, whether I get this job or not...
-----
Well, we discussed me moving out of state before, and she said no. I just need to push the issue. I'm not so worried about getting the job, or feeling like my bubble is burst because of her objection. It's something that's always in the back of my mind.
I am pretty open with her, no doubt. And she is so not open with me. I know very little of what happened with David while he was with her, and she doesn't have any digital pictures of him to send, and I doubt I'll ever see the analog ones that you take w/ 35mm film. It's very frustrating.
Thank you for caring about me, it means a lot. I keep her informed because it's the right thing to do. I wouldn't say we have a supportive relationship, because she said this in an email (quoth the raven):
You are stuck in florida until he's 18 unless you give me custody.
She doesn't really make demands on me, because she really can't. Since we figured out that our marriage was over, my best interests were never at heart, and lately I'm wondering if she cares about DS...I did not lay down and die in spite of how bad she was to me before she left. She was very surprised by my ability to stand up and withstand her horribleness, because I'm usually like a reed in the wind...
Because of the blatant-ness of the above statement, I contact my lawyer, and asked how much this will cost to get this one thing changed, and what the repurcussions will be. I have a back-up plan in case she stops paying CS...(she's been voluntarily unemployed since leaving Tampa), my main worry about opening up this can of worms...but we'll see what happens...
-----
The only reason I have David 95% of the time is because she chose to leave FL, and relocate to MO. State law says she can't take him with her, because that deprives me of my rights as a parent. Had she stayed here we would have had him 50/50.
It's my fault about me having to stay in FL, because that was part of our mediation. I never thought I'd leave, or want to leave, FL. It was not a big deal to me at the time. Now a bad decision is really biting me in the butt. She thinks that had she stayed, she would have primary custody. Je pense que non!
I'm in Florida because this is where I was born and raised. I'm here by default, I suppose. I have some other connections, but extended family doesn't really determine where I live, in this case, my mom and my sister. And doesn't really have anything to do with it, it's just bluster from her. But David is with me because I wanted him! And obviously, Amanda wanted her bf and seasons that you get in MO. There's not really seasons here in FL...David's going to have to live with that rejection for his whole life. I can hear her thought process, "Hmm...is it more important to be with my son, or the seasons and my bf? Easy choice!" Just amazing.
-----
Today, in "Relocation Hospital", we have our protagonist, Mr. Rusty, who spoke with Dr. Atty, about his prospects for the future. Dr. Atty says that it's going to be a difficult procedure. The extraction requires an "Intent to relocate" procedure, that Dr. Atty will help with. The cost is undetermined, since it's possible that the disease will fight, and more surgeries will be needed. (Cue 50's style pipe organ music)
Okay, that was fun. The atty says I have to file some forms, etc, and given what I know about the ex, she will fight it. I informed her of this change because she's going to find out anyway...I have no intention of giving the boy up to her. If I'd had my way, I would have kept her DD, too... Anyway...I share highlights of achievements, accomplishments, changes, but not things like "Lost my temper" or "Due to my negligence..." I've been telling him that I love him so much since yesterday. She won't get him...if I can't leave FL, I can't. It's pretty crappy, but it's my own stupidity that did it. Lately I wonder if she'll move back down here just to keep me from moving. Wouldn't that be sweet! It would be bad for me, but good for the boy, and bad for the ex...so I'm not sure about that now that I think of it.
I will not be the one who has to explain to him why I left him. She will.
Some baby center posts I've made recently
So, we made the exchange: xw came to get the boy, about 2 and a half hours late! Ugh. She said she'd be here after nap time...so I expected 3 - 4-ish...instead, I'm here at 6:35 PM seeing off my boy. He cried and cried about how he wanted his mommy! I told him to expect her at a certain time, and when she didn't show, he was very upset. A trip to the park cured some of this, but even at the park he asks, "Where's mommy's car?" and I tell him. What gets me the most angry is that she sends me a text message at 5:30 saying that she's in town, but is going to eat Thai first. It's ironic that the word "Thai" in that language means "free"...as in, free to hurt her son's feelings by being late, and being free to eat without a very difficult toddler! I know what it's like to try to go out to eat with a toddler in tow, but still, it's been 3 weeks since she saw him, you'd think she'd want to get here sooner, rather than later. Ugh!
It's funny, though, that her bf is almost like the valet: he doesn't say anything, he just gets the luggage and the car seat, and straps the boy in.
So there's my rant.
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She came down for Memorial Day, which is Monday, to spend time with him. He has one set of grand-parents who live about a 2 hour drive away from here, so I think they're staying there for the weekend.
She says that the only reason I have custody is FL state law, which prevents her from taking my right to be with my son away from me. She's funny, because she could have stayed here and we could share (you know, like GROWN UPS!), but she had to move away...
She'll have him this weekend, then again after his b-day in the summer, and one more week in the fall, then she gets him for two weeks over Christmas.
Given that this is the second time in a row that she's made him wait, I'm seeing a trend emerge...I think business associates would get more on time courtesy.
And the plan is to have the grandparents bring the boy back to me, so she doesn't have to, on Monday. These are the same grandparents who won't answer my calls, or be mature enough themselves for us to get together at some point for his sake. I'm not really that bad! Anything that may have occurred between my ex and me should not impact DS and grandparents! Sigh.
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I have strep throat, so I was home sick last night...the ex being late made me wait to go to the doc (aka, walk in clinic at walgreens), which prolonged my suffering. I didn't tell her, she didn't know I was sick...
I'm hoping to go to the Rocky Horror Picture Show tonight (Saturday), after I get some rest this afternoon. I have to work this morning. I already feel better just from one dose of antibiotic...no fever, no weakness or pain...Sunday I'm going to be a grown up and watch my show: CBS Sunday morning. It's some news, culture, and arts. And a quirky, offbeat story, too. And maybe I'll read the Sunday paper! I'm such a nerd. lol I have to work on Monday, too, but I get double time and a half, so that's not so bad, either. I may go to my mom's on Sunday and plant the gardenia bush I got her for Mother's day...and let her take care of her sick son, who is way too old for this sort of thing!
It's funny, though, that her bf is almost like the valet: he doesn't say anything, he just gets the luggage and the car seat, and straps the boy in.
So there's my rant.
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She came down for Memorial Day, which is Monday, to spend time with him. He has one set of grand-parents who live about a 2 hour drive away from here, so I think they're staying there for the weekend.
She says that the only reason I have custody is FL state law, which prevents her from taking my right to be with my son away from me. She's funny, because she could have stayed here and we could share (you know, like GROWN UPS!), but she had to move away...
She'll have him this weekend, then again after his b-day in the summer, and one more week in the fall, then she gets him for two weeks over Christmas.
Given that this is the second time in a row that she's made him wait, I'm seeing a trend emerge...I think business associates would get more on time courtesy.
And the plan is to have the grandparents bring the boy back to me, so she doesn't have to, on Monday. These are the same grandparents who won't answer my calls, or be mature enough themselves for us to get together at some point for his sake. I'm not really that bad! Anything that may have occurred between my ex and me should not impact DS and grandparents! Sigh.
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I have strep throat, so I was home sick last night...the ex being late made me wait to go to the doc (aka, walk in clinic at walgreens), which prolonged my suffering. I didn't tell her, she didn't know I was sick...
I'm hoping to go to the Rocky Horror Picture Show tonight (Saturday), after I get some rest this afternoon. I have to work this morning. I already feel better just from one dose of antibiotic...no fever, no weakness or pain...Sunday I'm going to be a grown up and watch my show: CBS Sunday morning. It's some news, culture, and arts. And a quirky, offbeat story, too. And maybe I'll read the Sunday paper! I'm such a nerd. lol I have to work on Monday, too, but I get double time and a half, so that's not so bad, either. I may go to my mom's on Sunday and plant the gardenia bush I got her for Mother's day...and let her take care of her sick son, who is way too old for this sort of thing!
Daddy's Sick!
So I get sick on Thursday afternoon. David hates it when I get sick. "Play me!" He says. "Get UP!" He says. But I can't get up. I have a fever, I'm tired, I just want to rest...which I get in about 15 minute intervals. He leaves me alone for longer than 15 minutes if I'm upright at my computer...Sometimes I'll tell David I'm sick, and he says, "Day-did sick, tew" and he'll lay his head down on me...but for the most part, he was very unhappy that I couldn't play with him, or do stuff with him...it was a very difficult day on Friday. I did recover some by Friday afternoon, so I could at least watch him competently outside. It helped me to be outside in the humidity. I kept apologizing to him all day, but it didn't matter to him. I felt bad that I could be with him like he needed/wanted.
We did do things that didn't require a lot of effort on my part, though. We named his fingers, and it occurred to me that when/if he gets married, he'll either have to wear a wedding ring on a chain on his neck, or on his right hand. Maybe he can tattoo the spot where his ring finger would be with some kind of ring design. Wouldn't that be fun! Sigh.
We did do things that didn't require a lot of effort on my part, though. We named his fingers, and it occurred to me that when/if he gets married, he'll either have to wear a wedding ring on a chain on his neck, or on his right hand. Maybe he can tattoo the spot where his ring finger would be with some kind of ring design. Wouldn't that be fun! Sigh.
David Weekly #18
Hello all...
We've had a pretty good week this week. Last Sunday, David and I went to Lowry Park Zoo, because they had a special "Get in for $5" deal...usually it's almost $20. It's a quality small zoo. David and I went on a camel, which he said was "bumpy". He will talk about the zoo at random now, telling you things about it, way out of context. Elephants, monkeys...a few other animals. At the zoo, I wasn't at all sure how he knew about the frogs, but he knew something about them, and was looking all around for them. Everywhere there was water. His other favorite thing at the zoo was the kangaroos. He wanted to see them jump, so he kept saying "Jump!" to them, but they didn't move. He also liked the wallabies, which he couldn't quite say: wa-ya-bees. We saw the kangaroos 3 times!
Did I mention that David's favorite TV show is "Super Why!"? He asks for this show all the time, even when it's not even close to the time for the show to be on. He loves it! Today we played Super Why stuff on PBSKids.org...they have a coloring thing...he's too young to control the mouse yet, but he sat in rapt attention at what I was doing. It was a letter-reinforcing activity.
David speaks for the most part in complete sentences. He doesn't have all the words, so he fills up what he doesn't know with something that sounds word-ish. So far, my favorite thing that I hear him say is "Ngingers" because he doesn't have the f at the front of all the words yet.
He actually gave me a kiss the other day, rather than offering his head to me like he usually does. So far, it is a one time event...
David has almost outgrown the 8 1/2 size shoe he has, so I put him in 9's. He loves his new shoes.
I also need to watch what I say to him. I tell him all the time to "Watch out!" for big and little things. So we were at the store, going down the aisle, and there was a man blocking the aisle...so David said "Watch out!" to the man. The man laughed and said to me, "I like your kid!" with a big smile on his face. David is endearing. Also at the store he decided that we needed bread, so he got a loaf, even after me telling him we don't need a loaf...and when I tried to get it back from him he RAN! I fell over laughing, because he really wanted it! Eventually I was able to convince him to put it back...
We went to my nephew's graduation from kindergarten...whew! What a challenge that was! When we were sitting next to his cousin Avery, he was pointing me out to her and whispering "Dat's Rwusty"...it was very cute.
Lastly, we have a sample conversation between David and I:
Me:Do you want to eat?
David: NO
M: Do you want to watch TV?
D: NO
M: Do you want to play cars?
D: NO
M: Do you like saying NO?
D: Yes!
Have a good week...
We've had a pretty good week this week. Last Sunday, David and I went to Lowry Park Zoo, because they had a special "Get in for $5" deal...usually it's almost $20. It's a quality small zoo. David and I went on a camel, which he said was "bumpy". He will talk about the zoo at random now, telling you things about it, way out of context. Elephants, monkeys...a few other animals. At the zoo, I wasn't at all sure how he knew about the frogs, but he knew something about them, and was looking all around for them. Everywhere there was water. His other favorite thing at the zoo was the kangaroos. He wanted to see them jump, so he kept saying "Jump!" to them, but they didn't move. He also liked the wallabies, which he couldn't quite say: wa-ya-bees. We saw the kangaroos 3 times!
Did I mention that David's favorite TV show is "Super Why!"? He asks for this show all the time, even when it's not even close to the time for the show to be on. He loves it! Today we played Super Why stuff on PBSKids.org...they have a coloring thing...he's too young to control the mouse yet, but he sat in rapt attention at what I was doing. It was a letter-reinforcing activity.
David speaks for the most part in complete sentences. He doesn't have all the words, so he fills up what he doesn't know with something that sounds word-ish. So far, my favorite thing that I hear him say is "Ngingers" because he doesn't have the f at the front of all the words yet.
He actually gave me a kiss the other day, rather than offering his head to me like he usually does. So far, it is a one time event...
David has almost outgrown the 8 1/2 size shoe he has, so I put him in 9's. He loves his new shoes.
I also need to watch what I say to him. I tell him all the time to "Watch out!" for big and little things. So we were at the store, going down the aisle, and there was a man blocking the aisle...so David said "Watch out!" to the man. The man laughed and said to me, "I like your kid!" with a big smile on his face. David is endearing. Also at the store he decided that we needed bread, so he got a loaf, even after me telling him we don't need a loaf...and when I tried to get it back from him he RAN! I fell over laughing, because he really wanted it! Eventually I was able to convince him to put it back...
We went to my nephew's graduation from kindergarten...whew! What a challenge that was! When we were sitting next to his cousin Avery, he was pointing me out to her and whispering "Dat's Rwusty"...it was very cute.
Lastly, we have a sample conversation between David and I:
Me:Do you want to eat?
David: NO
M: Do you want to watch TV?
D: NO
M: Do you want to play cars?
D: NO
M: Do you like saying NO?
D: Yes!
Have a good week...
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
No!
A sample conversation between David and me:
Me:Do you want to eat?
David: NO
M: Do you want to watch TV?
D: NO
M: Do you want to play cars?
D: NO
M: Do you like saying NO?
D: Yes!
Me:Do you want to eat?
David: NO
M: Do you want to watch TV?
D: NO
M: Do you want to play cars?
D: NO
M: Do you like saying NO?
D: Yes!
Ngingers
David's language is changing. Of course, for a toddler getting closer to 3, it does every day. I'm regularly surprised by things he says. Lately, he has no clue about prepositions. He says, "Play me" or "Sit me" (sit on daddy's lap, or sit with me). This morning already he said something new: "MY clothes" instead of "Day-did's clothes". He's also fascinated by his "ngingers", which he says a lot. He was pointing to his pinky, but he didn't know the names of the other ngingers, though he knows his thdumb. He's speaks in more full sentences more of the time, too. He's able to repeat words he hasn't heard before, and try to use them in the context he hears them.
He's getting better at different verb forms, past tense, present progressive...he's so expressive!
---
At the zoo, I wasn't at all sure how he knew about the frogs, but he knew something about them, and was looking all around for them. Everywhere there was water. His other favorite thing at the zoo was the kangaroos. He wanted to see them jump, so he kept saying "Jump!" to them, but they didn't move. He also liked the wallabies, which he couldn't quite say: wa-ya-bees. We saw the kangaroos 3 times!
He's getting better at different verb forms, past tense, present progressive...he's so expressive!
---
At the zoo, I wasn't at all sure how he knew about the frogs, but he knew something about them, and was looking all around for them. Everywhere there was water. His other favorite thing at the zoo was the kangaroos. He wanted to see them jump, so he kept saying "Jump!" to them, but they didn't move. He also liked the wallabies, which he couldn't quite say: wa-ya-bees. We saw the kangaroos 3 times!
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Unwelcome changes
David doesn't always call it his "Bah-dee" anymore, sometimes he calls it "Bwankie" which kills me, since it's something he picked up from Amanda when he was at her house.
David has outgrown another pair of shoes...so I put him in size 9 now, but his feet seem like they almost don't fit those shoes, either.
David has outgrown another pair of shoes...so I put him in size 9 now, but his feet seem like they almost don't fit those shoes, either.
The zoo!
Hello all...It's just after 10PM here on the west coast of Florida, and I'd like to share the day that I had with Statina, Rachel, and Dawn, and their kids...
First off, it was a great day! We had lots of fun. There's a zoo here called Lowry Park (it's more than just a zoo, BTW), and the usual admission is about $18 or so, but today they had a special admission for $5! Statina I think originally posted something about this, and I jumped on board!
My DS and I met the others in the parking lot, and we were pretty darn close to first in line. We met at about 9:15 or so, as the park opened at 9:30. It was a very overcast and muggy day to start...but soon after we got going inside, it cleared up some, and the humidity abated a bit.
The park is organized according to continent, and the way we ended up going took us to Australia. It sprinkled off and on for the first hour or so. We saw horses in their stable as they were being prepared for the pony rides that the kids went on (except for my son, since I don't think he could have handled the horse by himself), and kangaroos and wallabies, and a not much else in that section. David and I went to go play in one of the play areas that the park has, going down the slide, over and over, until the girls were done with the ponies. Statina got a drink, which was then shared by all 4 children. The kids got along so well!
After Australia, we went to Africa. We saw elephants, and giraffes...the girls fed the giraffes with special cracker-biscuits that you buy, and I just went along for the ride. Eliana (I'm not sure of the spelling -- one of the little girls, Kayla and Avalyn were the other two) was afraid of feeding the giraffe, so I picked her up and and she told me she was scared, but I took her hand and made her give the giraffe the cracker, which the giraffe just stuck out its tongue and got it from her. When she realized it happened, her face just lit up! I made her count her fingers, too, just as a fun way of pointing out (emphasizing) that she was okay. And my DS didn't get jealous, either!
We also did a camel ride. It was nice to be able to take each other's pictures, because you do it in pairs: each parent with kid. David said the camel was bumpy. He was afraid at first, but then thought it was cool.
We did some other just walking around, looking at animals, talking a bit...it was nice. Then we went to lunch. David told everyone that Daddy is very hungry! After a long line for lunch, we all got really lucky when two different sets of people left who just happened to be sitting next to each other...so the 8 of us got to sit together and eat. Whew! And it was inside, which was air conditioned, since it was still a very muggy day.
After lunch we went to the fountains...it's a big circle where water squirts up from little fountains, and the kids play and get wet. The girls (and their moms) were prepared for this, and I, of course, was not! But it was still fun to get wet, and not worry too much about it. David wanted to go see the kangaroos again, so we went to do that while the girls played in the water, and the moms all watched.
Rachel and Dawn left a little while after that, and I decided to stay with Statina, partly to keep her company (she was going to be there another couple of hours), and partly to finish exploring the park. David kept saying he wanted to go see the frogs...I haven't the foggiest notion of how he knew there was a place to go see frogs, but we went to go find the frogs, which, of course, were as far away from the starting point as we could get. Along the way we saw a komodo dragon (aka, GIANT WISSARD! -- in David-speak), and saw the Lorikeets (birds -- but very colorful!), and the orangutans (one of whom was a baby), and monkeys, and rhinos, and white tigers (who were sleeping). Somewhere along the line, David began to get tired, because he'd find a good spot, and lay all the way down...but when I would ask if he was sleepy, he'd say NO! and get up. We finally got close to the frogs, and looked at the frogs...
And then it was time to turn around and get back to the entrance so Statina's mom could pick her up for the drive home. Within 5 minutes of me putting my DS in my car, he was out!
I had a great day, and I'm thankful that I had a lot of fun with everyone that I went with. :-)
I took a nap, too, after we got home. I was tired, too. I then took a shower to rinse the day off me, and help settle my headache, which I had for a good part of the day. David slept until about 6:00 or so, about two hours, and then later we went to my mom's to get his blanket, and the food she made for me the other night...
It was so nice to have reasonable, rational, easy to get along with people to go and do something with. Quite a contrast to Amanda, who is not easy going.
First off, it was a great day! We had lots of fun. There's a zoo here called Lowry Park (it's more than just a zoo, BTW), and the usual admission is about $18 or so, but today they had a special admission for $5! Statina I think originally posted something about this, and I jumped on board!
My DS and I met the others in the parking lot, and we were pretty darn close to first in line. We met at about 9:15 or so, as the park opened at 9:30. It was a very overcast and muggy day to start...but soon after we got going inside, it cleared up some, and the humidity abated a bit.
The park is organized according to continent, and the way we ended up going took us to Australia. It sprinkled off and on for the first hour or so. We saw horses in their stable as they were being prepared for the pony rides that the kids went on (except for my son, since I don't think he could have handled the horse by himself), and kangaroos and wallabies, and a not much else in that section. David and I went to go play in one of the play areas that the park has, going down the slide, over and over, until the girls were done with the ponies. Statina got a drink, which was then shared by all 4 children. The kids got along so well!
After Australia, we went to Africa. We saw elephants, and giraffes...the girls fed the giraffes with special cracker-biscuits that you buy, and I just went along for the ride. Eliana (I'm not sure of the spelling -- one of the little girls, Kayla and Avalyn were the other two) was afraid of feeding the giraffe, so I picked her up and and she told me she was scared, but I took her hand and made her give the giraffe the cracker, which the giraffe just stuck out its tongue and got it from her. When she realized it happened, her face just lit up! I made her count her fingers, too, just as a fun way of pointing out (emphasizing) that she was okay. And my DS didn't get jealous, either!
We also did a camel ride. It was nice to be able to take each other's pictures, because you do it in pairs: each parent with kid. David said the camel was bumpy. He was afraid at first, but then thought it was cool.
We did some other just walking around, looking at animals, talking a bit...it was nice. Then we went to lunch. David told everyone that Daddy is very hungry! After a long line for lunch, we all got really lucky when two different sets of people left who just happened to be sitting next to each other...so the 8 of us got to sit together and eat. Whew! And it was inside, which was air conditioned, since it was still a very muggy day.
After lunch we went to the fountains...it's a big circle where water squirts up from little fountains, and the kids play and get wet. The girls (and their moms) were prepared for this, and I, of course, was not! But it was still fun to get wet, and not worry too much about it. David wanted to go see the kangaroos again, so we went to do that while the girls played in the water, and the moms all watched.
Rachel and Dawn left a little while after that, and I decided to stay with Statina, partly to keep her company (she was going to be there another couple of hours), and partly to finish exploring the park. David kept saying he wanted to go see the frogs...I haven't the foggiest notion of how he knew there was a place to go see frogs, but we went to go find the frogs, which, of course, were as far away from the starting point as we could get. Along the way we saw a komodo dragon (aka, GIANT WISSARD! -- in David-speak), and saw the Lorikeets (birds -- but very colorful!), and the orangutans (one of whom was a baby), and monkeys, and rhinos, and white tigers (who were sleeping). Somewhere along the line, David began to get tired, because he'd find a good spot, and lay all the way down...but when I would ask if he was sleepy, he'd say NO! and get up. We finally got close to the frogs, and looked at the frogs...
And then it was time to turn around and get back to the entrance so Statina's mom could pick her up for the drive home. Within 5 minutes of me putting my DS in my car, he was out!
I had a great day, and I'm thankful that I had a lot of fun with everyone that I went with. :-)
I took a nap, too, after we got home. I was tired, too. I then took a shower to rinse the day off me, and help settle my headache, which I had for a good part of the day. David slept until about 6:00 or so, about two hours, and then later we went to my mom's to get his blanket, and the food she made for me the other night...
It was so nice to have reasonable, rational, easy to get along with people to go and do something with. Quite a contrast to Amanda, who is not easy going.
Friday, May 16, 2008
David Weekly #17
David has done wonderful things this week. His favorite show is "Super Why!" on PBS...He asks for it every day! Here's a sample of our routine: He gets me up in the morning lately, because I want to sleep in...and I turn the TV on for him while we have breakfast. He really interacts with the TV shows, and he's learned the order of the shows, yet still asks for "Super Why!" At some point in the morning he gets tired of TV and wants to go outside. So we go outside and play for a while, and sometimes I do yardwork. Most days I sit in a chair and watch him run around while I drink hot tea. He usually gets me to participate in whatever he's doing, by dragging me by the arm, and not letting go. We have lunch a bit later...and then he asks to watch Pee-Wee, but I have started playing Skoo-Skoo Rock (School House Rock), and he loves it. Especially the "trains" (Conjunction Junction, what's your function?). But we do go through all of the different songs, which are a bit advanced for him, but it's good for him to see the words and numbers and all the different things that they show. Lately when we get to Dot's he jumps into his bed there and takes a nap right away, rather than doing this at home.
On Sunday I was trying to watch the only show I really care about (CBS Sunday Morning), and after most of the show was over, he finally figured out how to entertain himself: reading a book! I wondered why he was quiet, so I went in his room, and he was paging through one of his books! It was wonderful. I don't read to him as often as I should, but we do go to the liberry (library!) on Wednesdays still, and he's getting a bit better about sitting still for the story time, but not there yet. I took him again today and we read a couple of books there. He actually requested to go the library, and the park. He told Dot that we went to the library, or that we were going to go...It's amazing how his vocabulary is growing. I told him at the one park about how it was mulch, and he repeated, and used the word once or twice more to understand what it was. David tells me everything that's going on now. He was always expressive before, but now he's got words and concepts he can discuss and tell me about. So he does!
He does not like the nebulizer. When he says the word, he stumbles over all of the syllables, and it sounds like he's saying "Nebuchadnezzer" -- yeah, the guy from the Bible. The reason for the nebulizer is that he had a genuine asthma attack on Wednesday night. He was coughing some, but since he ran a fever, too, I thought it was minor. I gave him some cough medicine, and he slept through the night until about 6 AM when he woke up coughing. I gave him more cough medicine, and the usual Claratin (not sure on the spelling there), but he was coughing so horribly, and he was soooo whiny and difficult...he went to sleep at 10:30 Thursday morning, and then woke up a couple of hours later STILL coughing. So I dragged out the nebulizer. He screamed and cried (through coughs), but didn't fight me on it at all. After we did the treatment, he was happy as could be. No wet coughs, no ragged sounding breathing, just normal all the way around. I gave him another one on Friday morning, and he's been fine ever since.
While David was with Amanda, she discovered that the combination of Claratin and Benadryl almost completely healed his eczema. I discovered that it's the Benadryl that's doing the trick, because his hand in particular broke out on the Claratin alone. I've been giving it to him every day...but after just two days of the Benadryl by itself, his hands are remarkably better. I spoke with his pediatrician, who did not do a great job addressing this discovery of ours, and she said I should do all of the other stuff that really wasn't working...she also suggested Zirtech (?) for him, because it's a different kind of allergy medicine, and won't make him sleepy. So maybe I'll try that. She also said that he's not ready for the potty training bit, since he resists it so much, and she said not to push it. Okay...I won't. He knows to have me change the diaper very soon after he fills it...I ask him to tell me before, but he absolutely won't! Sigh.
So that's my week. I hope yours has been full of wonder, discovery, and joy.
On Sunday I was trying to watch the only show I really care about (CBS Sunday Morning), and after most of the show was over, he finally figured out how to entertain himself: reading a book! I wondered why he was quiet, so I went in his room, and he was paging through one of his books! It was wonderful. I don't read to him as often as I should, but we do go to the liberry (library!) on Wednesdays still, and he's getting a bit better about sitting still for the story time, but not there yet. I took him again today and we read a couple of books there. He actually requested to go the library, and the park. He told Dot that we went to the library, or that we were going to go...It's amazing how his vocabulary is growing. I told him at the one park about how it was mulch, and he repeated, and used the word once or twice more to understand what it was. David tells me everything that's going on now. He was always expressive before, but now he's got words and concepts he can discuss and tell me about. So he does!
He does not like the nebulizer. When he says the word, he stumbles over all of the syllables, and it sounds like he's saying "Nebuchadnezzer" -- yeah, the guy from the Bible. The reason for the nebulizer is that he had a genuine asthma attack on Wednesday night. He was coughing some, but since he ran a fever, too, I thought it was minor. I gave him some cough medicine, and he slept through the night until about 6 AM when he woke up coughing. I gave him more cough medicine, and the usual Claratin (not sure on the spelling there), but he was coughing so horribly, and he was soooo whiny and difficult...he went to sleep at 10:30 Thursday morning, and then woke up a couple of hours later STILL coughing. So I dragged out the nebulizer. He screamed and cried (through coughs), but didn't fight me on it at all. After we did the treatment, he was happy as could be. No wet coughs, no ragged sounding breathing, just normal all the way around. I gave him another one on Friday morning, and he's been fine ever since.
While David was with Amanda, she discovered that the combination of Claratin and Benadryl almost completely healed his eczema. I discovered that it's the Benadryl that's doing the trick, because his hand in particular broke out on the Claratin alone. I've been giving it to him every day...but after just two days of the Benadryl by itself, his hands are remarkably better. I spoke with his pediatrician, who did not do a great job addressing this discovery of ours, and she said I should do all of the other stuff that really wasn't working...she also suggested Zirtech (?) for him, because it's a different kind of allergy medicine, and won't make him sleepy. So maybe I'll try that. She also said that he's not ready for the potty training bit, since he resists it so much, and she said not to push it. Okay...I won't. He knows to have me change the diaper very soon after he fills it...I ask him to tell me before, but he absolutely won't! Sigh.
So that's my week. I hope yours has been full of wonder, discovery, and joy.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Asthma Attack!
So David had a full blown asthma attack last night, as he was really coughing, had a fever...I thought he was sick, really, rather than asthma...he hasn't had genuine breathing problems in forever. I got him home, and he was coughing in bed for a while, so I gave him cough medicine, and it helped him sleep through the night. I thought that he'd be over in the morning, but it was worse. He was coughing with every other breath, and was just plain miserable. I gave him some loratadine this morning, and more cough medicine. He took a nap at about 10 o'clock, and woke up around noon...and was still coughing. I then did the nebulizer, which he hates, but it cured his breathing issue: no more coughing, and no more wet raggedness in his breath. He was very happy after that. I was surprised when he didn't fight me, and relieved. It made taking care of him that much easier.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Lickety Letters!
David loves the "Super Why!" show, especially the pig. The pick says, "Lickety Letters!" as his little exclamation. David follows along with the story, the letters, and such...
I'm finding that I don't want to write because it hurts. David's being gone for two weeks really hurt me, and I find that I don't want to invest in him so much because of the pain I felt when he was gone. That's maybe another reason why I can't ever let him be gone for a long long long time, because I wouldn't know what to do with him when I did see him. I did okay with Douglas somehow, but I was never away from him for so long, or so heavily invested in him.
It's odd that he's been back for more than a week, but I'm not over him being gone...I'm depressed, and unhappy...dishes undone, toys everywhere, wrinkled clothes from unfinished laundry, and computer diving...where I try to drown myself in the computer to the exclusion of everything else. Except David of course. I'm getting better at feeding him, and not worrying about his eating so much. I do play with him, and do stuff with him...chores aren't getting done, and there's less joy in me. Sigh...
I'm finding that I don't want to write because it hurts. David's being gone for two weeks really hurt me, and I find that I don't want to invest in him so much because of the pain I felt when he was gone. That's maybe another reason why I can't ever let him be gone for a long long long time, because I wouldn't know what to do with him when I did see him. I did okay with Douglas somehow, but I was never away from him for so long, or so heavily invested in him.
It's odd that he's been back for more than a week, but I'm not over him being gone...I'm depressed, and unhappy...dishes undone, toys everywhere, wrinkled clothes from unfinished laundry, and computer diving...where I try to drown myself in the computer to the exclusion of everything else. Except David of course. I'm getting better at feeding him, and not worrying about his eating so much. I do play with him, and do stuff with him...chores aren't getting done, and there's less joy in me. Sigh...
Poem I wrote for a woman on BBC
I get overwhelmed by this kind of thought,
Even though my situation isn't as hard...
I just try to do what I ought,
And try not to feel so marred
This isn't the life I sought!
This wasn't on the card!
But life has me caught
And a bit battle-scarred
With my stomach in a knot
I go on, with this canard:
No matter what I haven't got
I will hold myself in high regard
Even though my situation isn't as hard...
I just try to do what I ought,
And try not to feel so marred
This isn't the life I sought!
This wasn't on the card!
But life has me caught
And a bit battle-scarred
With my stomach in a knot
I go on, with this canard:
No matter what I haven't got
I will hold myself in high regard
Friday, May 9, 2008
David Weekly #16
I don't know whether to call this number 16, or 17, since I missed a week with him being gone. I've pretty much made my choice, it would seem. It's been 17 weeks since Amanda left, or since I've been sending out these newsletters. I'm sure he had a great time at Amanda's up there. She said he had fun. And that she spent the first day with him putting him in time out for every little thing in order to establish her authority. She even said I should do that with him. Sigh. She figured out he's allergic to something, since his eczema healed almost completely up. It appears that it's the benadryl that has been doing the trick, so I'm going to call Dr. Sams to get him an allergy screening. I've been giving him the claritin but his skin is beginning to break out. Eczema and Asthma are related to each other somehow. David likes to tell me what PBS show is coming on, and he gets SO EXCITED! He really likes "Super Why!", a show I'm not overly fond of. Oh well, it isn't terrible.
Amanda didn't send out any kind of anything while she had him. That would have been a nice thing to have.
David came home on Saturday evening. When he came off the tram from the terminal to the main building, he saw me, and slowly, deliberately crumpled down to the floor, and just lay there for a minute. I went over to pick him up...he didn't seem overly happy to see me, nor was he upset. We wandered around the airport, David, Amanda, and I, got his luggage, and then we went up to the roof of the airport to watch planes come in for a while. Amanda said that when David got used to me, he began to act less manageably...but it seems that Colleen is the same way: when she has been away from her mom for a while, she acts up a bit in the same kind of way.
Normally I'm pretty good at details but this week I have only one thing I can think of that I relate:
Sunday night, David woke up screaming bloody murder. I could not for the life of me figure out what was wrong. It took me an hour of holding him, trying to get him to go back to bed, asking him what's wrong...he woke up and asked me to go sit at my computer and get some coffee for myself. I had been asleep for a few minutes...I heard his screaming, so I went to his bed, and then he asked me to do the coffee thing. It was 10:30. I told him that it was too late for coffee, but I'd sit with him for a while, but he just kept crying, inconsolable. I gave him some Gatorade (ga-reed)...but nothing I could do would make him feel better...I asked him if he hurt, if his tummy hurt, or his head hurt, or if he was hungry...eventually I asked him if he missed his mommy, and he said yes. I asked him if I could cry, too, but he said no. So I didn't cry with him. After that, he went back to sleep.
We're back in our routine for the most part. I like how he says and demonstrates (at the same time) that he is walking back---wards.
Meanwhile, I'm back on the potty training track. David tells me to change his diaper pretty soon after he gets smelly...I ask him if he can tell me before, rather than after, but he says no. I wonder what he's afraid of...
It's been a week...I hope next week will be a bit lighter on the subject matter.
Amanda didn't send out any kind of anything while she had him. That would have been a nice thing to have.
David came home on Saturday evening. When he came off the tram from the terminal to the main building, he saw me, and slowly, deliberately crumpled down to the floor, and just lay there for a minute. I went over to pick him up...he didn't seem overly happy to see me, nor was he upset. We wandered around the airport, David, Amanda, and I, got his luggage, and then we went up to the roof of the airport to watch planes come in for a while. Amanda said that when David got used to me, he began to act less manageably...but it seems that Colleen is the same way: when she has been away from her mom for a while, she acts up a bit in the same kind of way.
Normally I'm pretty good at details but this week I have only one thing I can think of that I relate:
Sunday night, David woke up screaming bloody murder. I could not for the life of me figure out what was wrong. It took me an hour of holding him, trying to get him to go back to bed, asking him what's wrong...he woke up and asked me to go sit at my computer and get some coffee for myself. I had been asleep for a few minutes...I heard his screaming, so I went to his bed, and then he asked me to do the coffee thing. It was 10:30. I told him that it was too late for coffee, but I'd sit with him for a while, but he just kept crying, inconsolable. I gave him some Gatorade (ga-reed)...but nothing I could do would make him feel better...I asked him if he hurt, if his tummy hurt, or his head hurt, or if he was hungry...eventually I asked him if he missed his mommy, and he said yes. I asked him if I could cry, too, but he said no. So I didn't cry with him. After that, he went back to sleep.
We're back in our routine for the most part. I like how he says and demonstrates (at the same time) that he is walking back---wards.
Meanwhile, I'm back on the potty training track. David tells me to change his diaper pretty soon after he gets smelly...I ask him if he can tell me before, rather than after, but he says no. I wonder what he's afraid of...
It's been a week...I hope next week will be a bit lighter on the subject matter.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
It's not all fun and games! Part II
I've been having trouble adjusting to David being back...he didn't seem like my son when he came back, he was some one else's son. I missed having him for two weeks, and I knew he'd change while he was gone, and that I would miss it. And I did miss it. It's not like when he's older he will change less, but now, at 2 and 3 quarters, he changes a lot in a short period. He came back with clearer speech...I also had to shake off the ickiness I got from Amanda. Not completely sure about how that happened, or what caused it, but I know it felt bad somehow. And then the two together...Back in the routine of things, too, laundry, feeding the boy, managing him...seemed like more of a burden than I remember, or ever thought or felt.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
From BBC, Sara Wrote this:
I just want to save this, because it's funny!
And from Renee:
ROFL - I love your stories, too! My DS is into sounds effects, also - they are a part of every story that he tells.
The 'dude' comments have me cracking up over here - I say that to DS ALL the time grin
Dude, please do not answer my cell phone and tell people I'm not home when I am. (I can imagine it now - "Yes, CPS, you heard me right. I'm here, and she's not.")
Dude, we just bought those shoes last week. Why is the sole missing from the left one?
Dude, why is there a dead cricket glued to this piece of paper?
Dude, to effectively brush your teeth, you only need to put toothpaste on the actual toothbrush. NOT the counter.
Dude, mommy probably wouldn't step on your toys if you put them back where they belong.
Dude, how exactly do you know for sure that a lego is causing the garbage disposal to make that sound?
Dude, the girls at school do not need to SEE your Spiderman undies. You can tell them about them if you want, but your pants should stay on.
Dude, how did this Transformer get into the fishtank? What do you mean the bad guy said he was going to 'swim with the fishies'? Dude!
Dude, we don't practice writing your name with Vasoline on the walls!
Boys are great. He absolutely cracks me with some of the odd things that he does. It can be difficult to act stern and upset when you're about to burst out laughing on the inside.
Great thread!
Sara
And from Renee:
Yeah - I dude him alot.
Dude, why are legos in the fridge?
Dude, what is that smell?
Dude, where are you going with that fireplace poker?
Dude, that is my foot you're standing on.
Dude, is that a pile of sand on the dining table?
Dude, why is the floor sticky here?
Dude, where are your pants?
And funny enough, he rarely dudes me back. He likes to say totally. As in:
Mom! You totally shut the door in my face while I was talking to you.
I am so mad. Totally.
This is totally the biggest lego tower in the world.
I totally spilled juice there and now it's totally sticky.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Conversation today over IM
R:hey...
A:hey. how's he doing?
R:He was fine until last night at about 10:30 when he woke up screaming
I couldn't figure it out, couldn't console him
and he just cried and screamed for about an hour...until I figured out that he misses you. When I asked him if he misses mommy, he said, "Yes" and quit crying
and then he went back to sleep
A:i'm sorry
i know that had to be hard...
R:it was
A:what do you want me to say?
R:I'm just letting you know...
A:ok
R:it's something you need to be aware of as his mother
A:yeah
R:did he do anything like that when he was up there?
A:no, nothing at all
A:he woke up coughing twice
A:that's is
it
R:yeah, he asks me for cough medicine
9:45 AM
R:you glad to have your alone time back?
A:i called it cough medicine because that's what he called it, but it was allergy medicine
R:ok
A:no, not really. would rather have him any day
R:I don't understand you.
A:why?
R:I don't understand how he's not the highest priority.
A:how would you suggest i make him the highest priority?
R:It's kinda late now. You moved up there to be with Tait and the seasons.
A:to be home, yes
i'm no good to him miserable
9:50 AM
R:You aren't much more good absent, either
A:well, this is the best that i can do
A:wish it could be more, but that's not possible
sorry, at panera have muted, and if didn't would be loud
R:it's okay
trying one way video chat
you can see us at least
he's watching himself in the camera
A:that's cool
R:can you accept the invite?
A:i did
it didn't do anything
R:yeah
It doesn't say anything on this end
maybe not enough bandwidth or that port is blocked
I wish you could see this
He's just being cute
10:00 AM
oh well...maybe that's something you can figure out on your end? Ask the panera people on their website about the free wi-fi?
R:David's watching Elmo
A:that's cool
i'm just sorting thru email
R:ok
it's been two weeks?
A:have over 200 in inbox with filtering them all thru my phone and deleting the ones i don't want
R:yeah
wow!
I need to go
he needs attention
10:10 AM
yeah
ttyl...
ok bye
A:hey. how's he doing?
R:He was fine until last night at about 10:30 when he woke up screaming
I couldn't figure it out, couldn't console him
and he just cried and screamed for about an hour...until I figured out that he misses you. When I asked him if he misses mommy, he said, "Yes" and quit crying
and then he went back to sleep
A:i'm sorry
i know that had to be hard...
R:it was
A:what do you want me to say?
R:I'm just letting you know...
A:ok
R:it's something you need to be aware of as his mother
A:yeah
R:did he do anything like that when he was up there?
A:no, nothing at all
A:he woke up coughing twice
A:that's is
it
R:yeah, he asks me for cough medicine
9:45 AM
R:you glad to have your alone time back?
A:i called it cough medicine because that's what he called it, but it was allergy medicine
R:ok
A:no, not really. would rather have him any day
R:I don't understand you.
A:why?
R:I don't understand how he's not the highest priority.
A:how would you suggest i make him the highest priority?
R:It's kinda late now. You moved up there to be with Tait and the seasons.
A:to be home, yes
i'm no good to him miserable
9:50 AM
R:You aren't much more good absent, either
A:well, this is the best that i can do
A:wish it could be more, but that's not possible
sorry, at panera have muted, and if didn't would be loud
R:it's okay
trying one way video chat
you can see us at least
he's watching himself in the camera
A:that's cool
R:can you accept the invite?
A:i did
it didn't do anything
R:yeah
It doesn't say anything on this end
maybe not enough bandwidth or that port is blocked
I wish you could see this
He's just being cute
10:00 AM
oh well...maybe that's something you can figure out on your end? Ask the panera people on their website about the free wi-fi?
R:David's watching Elmo
A:that's cool
i'm just sorting thru email
R:ok
it's been two weeks?
A:have over 200 in inbox with filtering them all thru my phone and deleting the ones i don't want
R:yeah
wow!
I need to go
he needs attention
10:10 AM
yeah
ttyl...
ok bye
Sunday, May 4, 2008
oh! the guilt!
So David just woke up screaming/crying...he wants me to go sit at my computer and have coffee...I'm guessing so he can sit with me. He's upset. He's sweaty from being too warm in bed, and I had put him down with his clothes on from the day (shorts and a t-shirt)...I change his diaper at his insistence, gave him some gatorade...and I ask him what's wrong, because nothing I do can console him, he just screams and cries more. Eventually I ask him if he misses his mommie, and he says "Yes." I tell him I miss her, too, and ask if I can cry, but he says, "No." So I keep a stiff upper lip. Acknowledging that hurt in him helped him stop crying, ironically. He went back to his bed...
I am just wracked with guilt that I didn't try to keep his mom and myself married, or that she moved away (and I stayed here -- not that that's my fault)...She seems to be a decent mom when I'm not around her, or when she's not avoiding being around me. I don't know of course, since she does a good job of making things seem better than what they are. When we were married, she avoided most parenting tasks, and left everything to me. I have no idea what happened when she had him, except what she tells me, and that he came back to me when he was supposed to, and he was clean.
I also hurt tremendously that he hurts. And he isn't even three years old!!
I am just wracked with guilt that I didn't try to keep his mom and myself married, or that she moved away (and I stayed here -- not that that's my fault)...She seems to be a decent mom when I'm not around her, or when she's not avoiding being around me. I don't know of course, since she does a good job of making things seem better than what they are. When we were married, she avoided most parenting tasks, and left everything to me. I have no idea what happened when she had him, except what she tells me, and that he came back to me when he was supposed to, and he was clean.
I also hurt tremendously that he hurts. And he isn't even three years old!!
Saturday, May 3, 2008
The Eagle Has Landed!
Hello all...David is back in Tampa-Town, safe and sound. I just put him to bed, but I bet he doesn't fall asleep right away.
The plane arrived about 15 minutes early, but it still took them about 30 minutes or so to get off the plane, and come out of the terminal to the main building.
He's changed so much in two weeks! His speech is so much more clear, his vocabulary is bigger...it's so amazing. When they got off the tram from the terminal, he saw me...and did a very dramatic, slow crumple to the ground. It was quite a thing. I went over and picked him up, and carried him all around, like to baggage claim. Amanda claims that he was so well behaved when she was with him, and as soon as he saw me became the not-so-well-behaved little boy/wild-child. She says that she doesn't carry him around, or chase him when he mis-behaves...but then she back-tracked and said something about how when her daughter was around other people she was an angel, and then when Amanda got Colleen, that's when she'd act up. Which means that Amanda is the 'other people' and I'm the parent.
I became a puddle of jelly with her around. We went to the post office at the airport, which is not in the landside terminal (BTW, the way the airport works is on a spoke/hub system, with the landside terminal at the center, and the airsides are the airline terminals, and they're connected by trams. Here's a map.), which means we have to get in my car and go to the post office...I always park my car on the roof, so I can watch planes, and of course, David wanted to watch planes, too, so we did that for a while. Then to the Post Office. At the post office David and I watched planes, and Amanda closed her PO Box that she had at the airport (on the recommendation of her atty). It was funny that she didn't understand why they gave her a dollar...it's a refund on the key deposit for the box...We had some serious discussion on the way back to the landside terminal. Several times I asked her if she wanted to go somewhere for dinner, since we had about two hours before she had to be back at the airport (she had a total of a 3 hour lay over before going back to MO). She said that she felt like David got to know her more in the two weeks that she had him than in the previous two years. I could only think, "It's all about you, isn't it?" You have to make sacrifices for your kids! She has sacrificed nothing, and is being so totally selfish...She's happy up there, but I'll never understand how she could leave him. He's just so wonderful. Anyway, she ultimately refused to have dinner with us...it's good for him to see us get along for the time we're together.
I mentioned to her that I still have feelings for her, and that I'm not holding on to the past...I wanted to have someone at the airport take a picture of the three of us, but that was a no-go...She was extremely apologetic, too, but not about the big things, like our relationship falling apart (or the way she treated me) instead about non-consequencial things, like me taking her to the post office. I told her I miss her "adult supervision" and she said that was one of the problems in our relationship...that's just BS...I was usually the adult, or just adults with very different ways of doing and being...she frequently wanted me to manage her, and I just won't do that. Of course, she'd get mad when I would...I was never strong enough to really step on her the way she seemed to need, or the way her current BF does now. He really dominates her, and she's a very strong person herself...But she's happy...
I still struggle with him being 'alone' with me, when he has a "full" family up there, with a mommy and a 'daddy' and a sister...Amanda tells me that when he first got up there that that he would point at her BF and say "NOT daddy!" over and over.
I know I'm the one who let her go, and encouraged her to be with her BF now. I knew our marriage wasn't working. I let her go. I also told her not to be late anymore for the airport. She just gave me the lame excuse that she didn't know where she was going...sigh.
I don't know why I'm still hashing this marriage/divorce thing with her, but it's strange. I have wild fantasies that she'll have a long layover and she can come back to my house...but I know that's not going to happen. I caught myself looking at her and being VERY attracted to her. I still love her, and told her so, and then I said, "Even though you've hurt me, and drive me crazy,..." Yeah, I'm pathetic. We spent some time just driving around the airport (at these gas prices?!) and talking. That was nice. Then I took her back to the dropoff point, and she gave David a kiss, and he waved goodbye to her...She said he needed his routine, even though she had an hour yet to get on the plane, and security is short and to the point at my airport.
When we got home he at a piece of pizza, and I had some, too, and we watched Pee-Wee, of course (yes, Pee-Wee Herman...my son loves him!) Then he went to bed...
Rusty
The plane arrived about 15 minutes early, but it still took them about 30 minutes or so to get off the plane, and come out of the terminal to the main building.
He's changed so much in two weeks! His speech is so much more clear, his vocabulary is bigger...it's so amazing. When they got off the tram from the terminal, he saw me...and did a very dramatic, slow crumple to the ground. It was quite a thing. I went over and picked him up, and carried him all around, like to baggage claim. Amanda claims that he was so well behaved when she was with him, and as soon as he saw me became the not-so-well-behaved little boy/wild-child. She says that she doesn't carry him around, or chase him when he mis-behaves...but then she back-tracked and said something about how when her daughter was around other people she was an angel, and then when Amanda got Colleen, that's when she'd act up. Which means that Amanda is the 'other people' and I'm the parent.
I became a puddle of jelly with her around. We went to the post office at the airport, which is not in the landside terminal (BTW, the way the airport works is on a spoke/hub system, with the landside terminal at the center, and the airsides are the airline terminals, and they're connected by trams. Here's a map.), which means we have to get in my car and go to the post office...I always park my car on the roof, so I can watch planes, and of course, David wanted to watch planes, too, so we did that for a while. Then to the Post Office. At the post office David and I watched planes, and Amanda closed her PO Box that she had at the airport (on the recommendation of her atty). It was funny that she didn't understand why they gave her a dollar...it's a refund on the key deposit for the box...We had some serious discussion on the way back to the landside terminal. Several times I asked her if she wanted to go somewhere for dinner, since we had about two hours before she had to be back at the airport (she had a total of a 3 hour lay over before going back to MO). She said that she felt like David got to know her more in the two weeks that she had him than in the previous two years. I could only think, "It's all about you, isn't it?" You have to make sacrifices for your kids! She has sacrificed nothing, and is being so totally selfish...She's happy up there, but I'll never understand how she could leave him. He's just so wonderful. Anyway, she ultimately refused to have dinner with us...it's good for him to see us get along for the time we're together.
I mentioned to her that I still have feelings for her, and that I'm not holding on to the past...I wanted to have someone at the airport take a picture of the three of us, but that was a no-go...She was extremely apologetic, too, but not about the big things, like our relationship falling apart (or the way she treated me) instead about non-consequencial things, like me taking her to the post office. I told her I miss her "adult supervision" and she said that was one of the problems in our relationship...that's just BS...I was usually the adult, or just adults with very different ways of doing and being...she frequently wanted me to manage her, and I just won't do that. Of course, she'd get mad when I would...I was never strong enough to really step on her the way she seemed to need, or the way her current BF does now. He really dominates her, and she's a very strong person herself...But she's happy...
I still struggle with him being 'alone' with me, when he has a "full" family up there, with a mommy and a 'daddy' and a sister...Amanda tells me that when he first got up there that that he would point at her BF and say "NOT daddy!" over and over.
I know I'm the one who let her go, and encouraged her to be with her BF now. I knew our marriage wasn't working. I let her go. I also told her not to be late anymore for the airport. She just gave me the lame excuse that she didn't know where she was going...sigh.
I don't know why I'm still hashing this marriage/divorce thing with her, but it's strange. I have wild fantasies that she'll have a long layover and she can come back to my house...but I know that's not going to happen. I caught myself looking at her and being VERY attracted to her. I still love her, and told her so, and then I said, "Even though you've hurt me, and drive me crazy,..." Yeah, I'm pathetic. We spent some time just driving around the airport (at these gas prices?!) and talking. That was nice. Then I took her back to the dropoff point, and she gave David a kiss, and he waved goodbye to her...She said he needed his routine, even though she had an hour yet to get on the plane, and security is short and to the point at my airport.
When we got home he at a piece of pizza, and I had some, too, and we watched Pee-Wee, of course (yes, Pee-Wee Herman...my son loves him!) Then he went to bed...
Rusty
A week!
It's been a week since my last post (forgive me Father, for I have sinned)...what a ritual. Anyway, David comes back today! :-) I'm happy about this. And since I haven't written, I may have been unhappy this past week. I kinda did fall down a well, but I was pulling myself out of it slowly anyway. I went out last night with my mom and her "Gentleman" friend...not sure if he's a boyfriend, or just a friend, but it doesn't matter. She was trying to get me to install a door on the back side of my house, since I don't have one, and he has an extra door. I'm glad they came to my house, because it gave me an excuse to clean up the inside of house, since I've been working on the house outside with all that pressure washing. I got mad at my mom because she was like, "You're not done?" and my response: "Try washing your whole driveway with a pencil eraser!" It was actual work pressure washing my driveway...more than I expected. I'm afraid to look at my list, but I think I got some stuff done. I wrote few things on BBC that I'll have to transfer here, as this forum isn't very interactive.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Called Out...
How am I doing? Not keeping up well enough with my blog...remembering what it's like to be single...It's been 4.5 years since I met my ex...I'm getting used to my empty house, and my empty schedule, and figuring out how to fill it back up, only to know that my DS will be back in 52 hours. Yup, he'll be back on Saturday at about 6 PM or so.
I cried a lot for the first few days that he was gone. I'm not sure why that was so traumatic, since he'd been gone once before (just after Christmas) for about 10 days.
I'm finding it hard to tell you what's going on with me, since I find it hard to believe that anyone really wants to know. I know you do, but it's something I struggle with.
I've gotten done some chores that would have been difficult or impossible with him here, like pressure washing my driveway, and some other stuff around the house. I went to the dentist today? I haven't gone to the movies, but I watched one that I just happen to have (my ex left a lot of movies on VHS)... 8mm...don't watch that if you're unhappy and depressed. Or if you're in a good mood.
As I read over this, I realize how much I feel withdrawn from life, and how hard it is to engage in life (as I knew it before) now that I have this anchor in my life named David. It's hard enough for me to get out and do things, but more so since I have him. There's a local yahoo group for 'families' but after I joined it seemed only to be married families with moms and dads and kids. And me, the sore thumb. But I didn't really join for myself as much as for my DS, because play groups are good, something to do during the day other than watch TV (all PBS, all the time) is good, getting out of the house is good.
I'm beginning to worry all over again about being a good parent, how he's going to readjust to being home again, how I'm going to readjust to him being around all the time again.
I know the first item when he gets back is Potty Training (I write this as the ad to my left shows a small child on the potty lol :-)
Rusty
PS Thanks for asking. :-) Meow!
I cried a lot for the first few days that he was gone. I'm not sure why that was so traumatic, since he'd been gone once before (just after Christmas) for about 10 days.
I'm finding it hard to tell you what's going on with me, since I find it hard to believe that anyone really wants to know. I know you do, but it's something I struggle with.
I've gotten done some chores that would have been difficult or impossible with him here, like pressure washing my driveway, and some other stuff around the house. I went to the dentist today? I haven't gone to the movies, but I watched one that I just happen to have (my ex left a lot of movies on VHS)... 8mm...don't watch that if you're unhappy and depressed. Or if you're in a good mood.
As I read over this, I realize how much I feel withdrawn from life, and how hard it is to engage in life (as I knew it before) now that I have this anchor in my life named David. It's hard enough for me to get out and do things, but more so since I have him. There's a local yahoo group for 'families' but after I joined it seemed only to be married families with moms and dads and kids. And me, the sore thumb. But I didn't really join for myself as much as for my DS, because play groups are good, something to do during the day other than watch TV (all PBS, all the time) is good, getting out of the house is good.
I'm beginning to worry all over again about being a good parent, how he's going to readjust to being home again, how I'm going to readjust to him being around all the time again.
I know the first item when he gets back is Potty Training (I write this as the ad to my left shows a small child on the potty lol :-)
Rusty
PS Thanks for asking. :-) Meow!
Taking Stock
So, it's May Day, 1st of May, a holiday in some countries to celebrate the worker (our version of this is Labor Day), and is the mid-point between the beginning of Spring, and the beginning of Summer. In Northern European countries, it's the beginning of Summer (and lasts until September 1).
For me, New Year's is not the only time to reflect back on the year...for me, looking back at shorter intervals helps keep me on track, focussed, moving in the direction I want to go. And I'm so likely to forget stuff that happened at the beginning of the year.
So what's been going on in the first 4 months of the year? Even if you just take it day by day, something good (or not so good) worth remembering happened.
For me, I'm just realizing that I've made it through with help from family all by myself. I've learned and grown, and so has my son.
For me, New Year's is not the only time to reflect back on the year...for me, looking back at shorter intervals helps keep me on track, focussed, moving in the direction I want to go. And I'm so likely to forget stuff that happened at the beginning of the year.
So what's been going on in the first 4 months of the year? Even if you just take it day by day, something good (or not so good) worth remembering happened.
For me, I'm just realizing that I've made it through with help from family all by myself. I've learned and grown, and so has my son.
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