Friday, February 29, 2008

David's 8th Week

David went to the ice skating rink this week on Sunday for his cousin's birthday party. He did not like it when his father went skating without him. He cried and cried. He did like running around with the other kids, and he wanted a balloon, so we got him one. He calls it a 'moon.' The other thing that he really liked was the Zamboni...which he said with great gusto. Zamboni daddy! and he'd point at it. He loved that thing. Thought it was great. Zamboni zamboni! And he could say the whole word with no problem! :-D

David gives hugs now. Of course, since he doesn't pronounce the 'h' sound yet, they are 'ugck's...but it's still cute when he puts his little arms around you, and squeezes. It's curious to me that he can say certain sounds, but only in certain ways. He says "Dee", but not duck...they are still guck.

So on that note, let's play a game: Guess what color David is saying!

1. Wa-er
2.
3. po-pur
4. (r)wo-off
5. back!
6. meek
7. (w)een
8. Ursss

You may think I've forgotten #2, but when I point out an item of that color, he doesn't say a thing...so bonus points if you get #2.

Did I mention that David can say 'urts'? Yeah, when something's wrong, he can tell me that it hurts, like his knee that he skinned again the other day. I put bactine on it, and he said it hurts...and cried for a second or two. He's going to have a lot more skinned knees in the future.

There is very little about a toddler that is orderly. This includes eating. David's eating has been described by Amanda as 'grazing'...I tend to think that his eating is just chaos...however, any partially open door (like a cabinet door) is met with repeated "cose door!" demands. David has a strong sense of order. His eating, however, does not figure into this sense of order...I've figured out his eating dinner issue: he eats late since I think that Dot is feeding him so well that he's not hungry when we get home. So I've changed dinner time to 7:30 or so, and I'm letting him stay up until 9:00, because he doesn't go to sleep right away, so why not try to work with that. I think he's inhereted his mother's ability not to sleep a lot.

Because of his reading of the Baby Animals book, he's seeing mommies and babies all over the place. He'll point in the store, loudly, at a baby and then that child's mother. "Baby! And mommy!" Other things bring up this concept to him as well. We were at the neighbor's house, and they have a big screen TV and a regular 19 inch set. He said the small one was the baby, and the big one was the mommy. Meanwhile, I'm beginning to pronounce things in the animal book in French. He used to protest, but now he is beginning to accept French names for things when I read them to him, instead of protesting…

David likes to play this game: He says, "Huh?" Then he answers himself by saying, "oh." And then he gets me to say Huh? then he repeats it, Huh? And then he says "oh"...and then I say it...It's a great little game.

David has decided that not only is it okay that I sing, but especially when I sing "The Witch Doctor." In fact, it's the only song I'm allowed to sing. He even asks me to sing it sometimes, by saying "oo-oo-oo--aa-aa-aa--ee-ee-ee", and then, SING!!!!

Our morning routine has changed some, lately... now I get up and while I'm getting a shower he will come in and brush his teeth! I have to remind him to close the door, but he does, and then will brush his teeth.




ANSWERS:
1. Yellow
2. Blue
3. Purple
4. Red
5. Black
6. Pink
7. Green
8. Orange -- already this has changed. It sounds more and more like "orange" than urss...it happened over this week...

A lot has happened this week. I even think I got most of it.

I hope you've had a good week!

Saturday, February 23, 2008

It's official: I'm divorced

So yeah, my lawyer calls me to say he got the papers...I officially am divorced the day after Valentine's day. February 15, 2008. Nice. I hope the judge waited an extra day, because he thought to himself, "Nah, I'm not going to sign those papers today. It's Valentine's day."...

I'm waiting for the papers in the mail...

I don't think I'm as excited about my divorce as Avery15 is about hers, but I'm glad it's over, and still sad...

Friday, February 22, 2008

David, Week 7

I think I'm on week 7...

David's had an up and down week. He's asking now very specifically for which pajamas he wants to wear to bed each night. Sometimes it's the syaurs (dinosaurs), which are various shades of green, and other times it's spom-bob (sponge bob)...if he doesn't volunteer anything, I put him in the white ones with little wrenches and screw drivers...he likes those, too.

Wednesday night was a difficult and scary night. He had a terrible cough that wouldn't stop no matter what I did: gave him cough medicine, which usually does the trick, didn't work. I put the vaporizer on in his room with the Vicks camphor in the water, and he finally quit coughing after midnight. He went down without much fuss, interestingly. But then coughed and coughed and coughed...so I gave him a nebulizer, which did help a bit, because it slowed his fits down some, and made them less dry. I called Amanda about this, and she gave me some tips on dealing with it. I wasn't sure if I needed to take him to the emergency night pediatrician...but it proved not necessary.

The whole potty training thing has me perplexed. I ask him if he wants to go potty, but he rather than just saying no, or ignoring me, he screams NO PO-YEE! I don't know why it's such a bad thing...I've figured out his rhythm, but getting him to go is the hard part.

Last Sunday he did something very funny. I sometimes try to imitate things he says which are unclear. Sometimes I understand by doing this, and other times, I'm still clueless...so anyway, I get frustrated once in a while and just say total blather at him, and he got upset at me and blathered back. I wish I could repeat this in a way that you can hear, because it doesn't work in print...I also took him to the store and on the way he points out every truck he sees, and because there are a lot of them, he was repeating over and over...so I just said trucktrucktrucktruck...and so now he sees a truck and says guckguckguck! He still doesn't produce consonant blends, which is why they are gucks...He's really imitating many many things. FOR EXAMPLE: he got some great cards for Valentine's day (from Frank, Nancy, and Marissa) with one a dog, and the other a cat, and the lips were chocolate. I kissed the lips of the cards, just to try to get him to do it...and now he just wants me to kiss the cards, and he won't. So I put them away. He loved the chocolate though. Love it loved it!

And every night when we get home, he wants to blow bubbles...he whispers at me, like we're in church: bow bubbos...

Last Saturday I cooked some pizza in the oven. He's figured out that it's okay if it's hot, as long as it's not too hot! But he was so much wanting a piece of pizza that he was confused about waiting for it to be cool enough, or eat it too hot. It was something to see!

And David has a new baby sitter. Her name is Rhiannon, she's 14...I spent some time with her at her house, talked to her father, let David wander around her house...she has a brother and sister who are 8 and 6, I think, so she's had some experience with younger kids...David likes her, which is good. She can either keep him there, or here at my house...by the way, David knows that this is my house, and his house, but "our" house is still foreign to him...David asked me to take a walk with him, but instead I had him walk with her, and says to me, "BYE!" as he leaves. I like her better than the girl that lives across the street, because Lexi, the girl across the street, tends to hide things, and doesn't strike me as trustworthy, though we did leave David and Colleen with her...but David can't report things to me the way that Colleen could. Rhiannon's dad is better about making rules, and keeping up with her, which makes me feel better. She's also more down-to-earth, too.

Tonight David had me get the vaccuum cleaner out of the closet and do the floors...not sure at all what prompted that. I think that some kind of alarm went off in his head...

Finally, our walks to Dot's house are turning into me carrying him everywhere...I guess it still works out, because I'm still walking, and running...with an extra 30 pounds in my arms. David still points out the cars, trucks, and school busses that go by. He likes playing the "up down" game, where he directs me either up off the road, or down in the road. He thinks it's great fun.

I'm beginning to have to limit the books that he reads before laying down, because he will want to read all 6 of them, since they are there. And of course, this takes 30 minutes or more, because he wants to play during and between books...I realized that this wasn't good bonding, because he's just keeping awake, not sleeping, keeping me in there...

Friday, February 15, 2008

David's Sixth Week

I'm beginning to lose track of which week it is...

Tuesday night, after I picked up David from Dot's, we played in the rain. It was warm enough, and no thunder/lightning issues...the first drops that hit his head he says, "OW!" and "OW!" again. It was really funny. He thought because they were hitting his head he should make the pain sound, but then after a few minutes he realized that it didn't hurt, so he began to have fun with it. We went for a long walk, but didn't get too too soaked.

David got good stuff for Valentine's Day: Chocolates and skittles and stickers and a read-along book set from Amanda, and a card from my mom.

On Wednesday night we got him new shoes. They're the kind that light up when you walk. Funny thing is, I don't think he cared that much. He was more interested in the fact that the shoes look like, or had, cars on them. They're size 8 1/2. Yup, he's growing. I bought these shoes just before he's about to outgrow the ones he wears now...then we went to the park. We took a walk on the board-walk next to the lake shore. We saw ducks, and squirrels. David does not like the wind for some reason. When it blows he holds his hair, or wants his hood on, and he says "Ween!"

We started reading a few different books than the Foot Book, the Animal Book, and the numbers book (counting to 10 with the different football players)...so now he asks for the "green" book: Green eggs and ham. He's getting to the point now where I'm beginning to point out words to him, which he will eventually know by sight. My sister says that she was amazed by the fact that he already knows most of his letters. He is close to recognizing "baby" ... because that's the name of the animal book -- Baby Animals. I point to the word and he points out the letters and we spell it, then we go back and sound it out, then we say the word...

Teaching David is a process: because he chooses to stay out of bed, I have to get him to go back into bed. And then again and again until he's asleep. And once in a while in the middle of the night he's still in the middle of the floor, curled up, no blanket...I can hear his bed creak when he gets out of it, no matter how slowly he moves.

Dinner time is a difficult time for us: David just does not want to sit in one place to eat. And sometimes he doesn't want what we're having. He's good at suggesting alternatives, though. One night he picked out soup (Chicken and Stars), and some canned fruit. And a piece of bread. I'm puzzled because he likes spaghetti and meatsauce, but didn't want any...it's hard to get him to eat what's in front of him...I wonder if it's good that he has an opinion of what he wants to eat, in spite of the fact that he already has something he likes in front of him. And he made good choices, too. I think it's funny that it's easier to get him to eat vegetables than meat. If I do have something he likes, he's more likely to sit at the table longer to eat.

Lately in the mornings he's expressing interest in going to Rachel's house, or staying home. When I tell him it's time to go for a walk to Dot's, he gets really upset! He does not want to go there. I wish I understood why. After he gets over being upset about going, he's okay...but dealing with this upset child is tough!

Bathtime is getting better. Wednesday night I was able to wash his hair with zero fuss from him.

Sleep is still an issue: he doesn't fall asleep for a while, sometimes 2 hours. He'll just lay there, and play the "can I get on the floor" game...and not fall asleep. And sometimes because of this he'll not want to wake up in the morning, and so I have to deal with an unhappy, crying child, who wishes he was still asleep. And then he doesn't want to go to Dot's...

David's still getting to be a great talker: Whenever he sees one of something, and then a second something, he used to say "more". Car! Then, more car! So I've been teaching him to say "another one"...which he now says. It's even better when he says "another one" and I ask, "Another one what?" and he tells me. I like that he can keep up with what's going on.

So here are a bunch of little things that happen over time. I don't know how to relate them all, and as this routine becomes more normal, I'm finding less novelty in the things he does, which makes them less notable, or I somehow examine them less. I'm trying to keep track of things as they happen over the week so I can relay all of them here...I'm hoping that you find value in these little notes, as I'm hoping that you care what's happening in David's life, and how he is growing and changing. He does really funny, wonderful, interesting things, and they all happen so fast sometimes, and all at once, it's hard to keep up.

Friday, February 8, 2008

David's Fifth Week

Hello...

So this week David skinned his knee. We were out for a walk, and he took off at a run and tripped, and fell. He skinned his knee. He said that it hurt in his cute pre-schooler way. When we got home, I sprayed Bactine on it, and that made it all better. Then he asked for something to protect it, so I got a band-aid. He was happy after that. I think this is the first time he's actually been injured where skin was broken.

A bigger issue has been that he's constipated. Dot, my baby sitter, has been helping me with this. She suggested prune juice. David only had one cup, and now I've got lots of prune juice that he won't drink, and neither will I. Oh well. But I've found out that it seems that his rhythm has changed...so I'm changing icky diapers at different points than I was before...

The last thing is that all of a sudden this week he's decided that sleeping when it's bed time is not the thing to do. Instead, he stayed awake until after 11 one night, and then woke up several times over the night. I was very tired the next day. So I've learned that him being in a toddler bed is about process: put him back in his bed, show him how to close his eyes...the next night I had him close his eyes after I put him to bed, and he would peak at me for a while until he finally fell asleep. I still find him on the floor...I don't think that's going to change any time soon. On the other hand, I find that if I go in to his room now, he will get back in bed if he's awake, and if he's asleep I can put him back in his bed. It's taken about a week of checking, rechecking, and rechecking again to get him to stay in his bed long enough to fall asleep.

Did I mention that David is really smart? On the night of the Superbowl, he was asking me to go for a walk...but I told him no, it's too dark. So, he went and got the flashlight! I was soooo amazed by this. I don't know how he put that together, except to credit his intelligence. It was just a wonderful thing.

I'm not much in a literary mood this evening. It's been a struggle for both David and me, with me learning again how to be a parent to him. He changed without telling me, and I'm sure that will happen again and again. We went to a place called Choxotica...which sells all kinds of exotic chocolates, and they are very expensive! David thought the place was great. It's cool, and has lots of space. I didn't buy any, but still. It was an experience. I'm getting David used to being out more in more places. I'm finding that to be a challenge, too. David's tantrums are great? He has them, then goes on with life, usually in the corrected fashion that I was trying for first. But it's hard to deal with sometimes.

David likes to play a game he calls "boo-wa!"...we set up the plastic bowling pins and he hits them all down with a bat, and I set them back up. And then we do that again until I'm tired of it. :-)

I'm not really sure what else to report at this point. Is there anything you'd like to know? Anything you think I've missed? I feel like I miss all kinds of things when I write this...it's important that you know what's happening with him. I can't remember everything...and I don't want to leave things out.

So let me know. I'm trying to tell you everything about David...

Rusty

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

To Sleep, perchance to dream

My DS is having trouble getting to sleep at night. I put him in a toddler bed about a month ago, and I'm discovering that over the last week or so that he's getting out of bed, playing with toys, doing anything else but sleeping. Then, sometimes in the middle of the night, he starts crying, but it's not crying it's a crying type noise...not quite moaning, but something. I'll bring him into my bed for a while, then take him back to his, and I'll find him on the floor in the morning.

Not sure what to do with all of this. Not sure why he cry/moans in the middle of the night, or why he doesn't sleep in his bed, or why he wants to stay awake until 11 PM or midnight! He's 2, BTW.

Last night I stood in the doorway and told him to close his eyes, which he did, and then I caught him checking to see if I was still there a few times until he finally feel asleep. I know I don't want this to be the situation going forward...I've yelled at him to get back in bed, which he does...he knows he's supposed to be in bed.

How do I resolve this? It's several issues all at once, it seems, and it's costing me sleep! He woke me up at 1, 2, and 3 AM this morning...I'm really concerned about whether this is normal, or what his story is. I just want him to be okay. It's also hard in the mornings because now I have to wake him up instead of him already being awake...sigh.

Y'all are great. Thanks.

--------

very...

Actually, this is great. You've told me two very important things: they don't realize how much time has gone by for sleep or not, and "transitioning" is a present-progressive tense verb: it's a "still ongoing" thing...not a one night solution. These two things reassure me. I remember when I was 5 wanting to go to bed at 7PM, and then I'd be awake at 5AM...My parents actually had to have me stay awake just a bit longer so I'd sleep more in the morning.

Oh, and you confirmed my thought about not being trapped in the crib. And of course, that I'm not alone. :-)

David slept better last night. I have to go in there every so often to get him to go back to bed, enforce the rules, etc...He woke up in a good mood today. But he was still on the floor when I went in his room this morning. I think it's because he can play with the drawer-pulls on his dresser. They're the lions holding the ring in their teeth. He plays with that until he falls asleep, I think. Maybe I should chill out about that...it's a repeated motion kind of thing, rather than a genuine "play!" kind of thing. Repeated motion may help him fall asleep...he can't count sheep, after all, or say mantras ;-)

-------

KM, (HDBsMama)-- It does help. I'm learning that there aren't "instant solutions" to these things. I've learned, for example, that eating a decent meal before bedtime, and not right before bedtime helps him sleep. Everything is a process...eating, feeding him, making sure he eats, and sits at the table to eat...a process. Repetition. Repetition. Repetition. He's discovered that he doesn't have to be in bed, so he's not. Getting him to sleep...he does close his eyes when I tell him to, and when I stand over him, he peaks at me for a while until he falls asleep. But then he wakes up later is found on the floor in the morning. :-)

He hasn't voluntarily come to my bed, yet...I do appreciate all the kind words. They are helping me, and helping my son :-)

--------
Melanie...not a repeat. David is 2 and a half...I was just realizing that David changed without telling me! He's figured out he's not stuck in his bed! David has a hard time settling down, too. Even with the "settle down" routine, he's still way full of energy. David never went to sleep right away in any case, but what's different is that he's getting smarter, and because of that re-figuring out his limits. Not sure who else pointed that out, but it's right on! I don't think I would have put that together by myself.

I'm so thankful for this board, and the great things people have been saying!

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Good News II

I'm especially glad that I don't "need" it to live on, because I read all the horror stories about what happens when it isn't paid. And that is something that worries me greatly. Part of the reason that I'm able to make it alone is that she was nickle and diming us to death with lots and lots of small purchases. With her not making all those purchases, it's easier for me to keep up with everything,...I'm not much of a spender...I usually make dumb purchases for big things once in a while. But then, lately I don't feel deprived of anything, and I feel like I have everything I need, and I don't really want much...that also makes it easier to say no to my 2 year old, because I think of the mountain of toys he has at home.

And about my name: yes, it's Russell; I'm named after my grandfather. I've always been Rusty around my family and friends. I feel like my name was taken away by my ex because she refused to call me Rusty...Russell is more like my name at work. So part of me returning to 'me' is my name being what I think it should be, and what it has been to those that are most familiar and close to me...

Saturday, February 2, 2008

Good News

No, this is not the "Good News" from the bible. And it's not GEICO, either. :-)

I've just figured out that I don't really 'need' the child support that I'm getting from the ex! Whoohoo! I adjusted my taxes that are taken out of my paycheck, and if I work just 5 hours overtime per paycheck, I'll have everything I need without having to dip into the child support. On the other hand, I could work no OT and spend about 25% of the child support, and have the rest left over for emergencies...and naturally I will be investing in my son's education with the pre-paid college education thing...
so this is all very good!

I just have to remain disciplined with myself...which shouldn't be too hard since I'm not much of a spender anyway...my one indulgence is premium loose hot tea. But there's only so much tea that one can drink...

Friday, February 1, 2008

David's Fourth Week

David would like everyone to know that the solution used to blow bubbles does not taste good.

He's gotten me to stay outstide with him in the carport to blow bubbles. I'm learning that you can't leave him alone for a second because he'll do something unexpected, like try to drink bubble solution from the cup it's in. He took enough that it was really a funny bad look on his face, but nothing harmful. I was on the phone with my friend James at the time, and he says that David now gets a "freebie" later on if he curses: I will say, "David, when you were two, you drank soap solution for making bubbles, so I won't wash your mouth out with soap, because you did it to yourself." I thought that was hilarious. :-)

David Carries around three cups: gold juice, wa - er, and milk. When we get home, at some point he will realize that he doesn't have his cups. He is more interested in having them around, and making sure they are in a neat little line, than actually drinking from them. Although, he does like the OJ. He will ask for more, after drinking half a cupful.

I've compiled a list of words that he says, after reading about how kids at a certain age should have a vocubulary of 300 - 500 words. I don't think David is the age where this is right, but it was a fun excercise just the same. I came up with about 60 or so. I'm not sure if some things, like "Get it" should count as one word or two. He's figured out what a truck is, too. So now they are "guck!" which is the same word for "duck" too...

Pook - spoon or fork
Read da book
Boo - book -- foot book
Gitit -- get it
Sit dair!
Anmal book
Goose cow horse sheep duck dog cat milk gold juice bu-by (butterfly) peewee bears na-na go! No sing! Wa-er bye-bye dthash walk spider remote (mote) dis! Dat! Nigh-nigh color (cuh-yer) purple orange (ors) bubble ball see cup (40) up! Nur/neer (down) shoe sock eye ear nose mouth arm beet (feet) eat! (food or toothbrush or teeth) on off daddy mimi mom boy sissy car bus (60) box knee po-ye bob (veggie tales) green beep beebpeer (diaper) spongebob

A note or two about this list. I've left off a few more words that I expect, since I wrote this list a few days ago, and I realize that some of the words are situation specific, like socks that go with shoes...He's also getting better at repeating words that he hears for the first time. Another thing, I'm not sure why he hates it so much when I sing. So he says "NO SING!" when I sing, or even when I whistle. Maybe it's really that bad! :-) Interestingly, he does the hand motions for Kumbaya when I start singing that. He thinks it's great fun. And he makes me do it.

I've thought I should turn the focus to myself for a minute, but as I write this I can't think of why that was a good idea. Instead, what I think is that taking care of myself is at least as important as taking care of David. I'm making sure to keep up with the cleaning, and eating properly...oatmeal is my breakfast most days, with half a banana that David didn't eat from the night before. He loves fruit, but he never eats it all, so I save it for my breakfast. Dinners are usually full of vegetables, and whole grain bread, and whole grain rice (which takes longer to cook), and fruit, of course.

I've been taking David for longer walks...I realized that there's nothing that we have to rush home for, and we have a few more minutes of daylight...so we're exploring the neighborhood. David is sooooo good about getting out of the road, it's amazing. He's very alert about cars, and very cautious. Of course, he's two, so he forgets once in a while to look...that's why I'm around. ;-)

For some reason, David has taken to sleeping on the floor...not sure why...I do know that he liked sleeping in my bed enough that one night he woke me up at midnight and then cried and cried and cried when I told him he'd have to stay in his bed. That was a rough night for both of us. The next night he slept okay with no problems.

Sometimes I think I should send this out on Sunday nights rather than Friday, since I seem to forget something that happened over the weekend. But I feel like I forgot something from Monday or Tuesday...The Monday before last we went to the doctor, and she gave him a clean bill of health. I figured out the coughing thing: it's something to with air circulation, post-nasal drip, or something else. He likes to go to sleep with a new air circulator thing with a blue light that David wants on at night when he goes to sleep. I had left the door open to his room one night, and he coughed all through the night. But then after another two days he didn't cough anymore. He was just sick. Nothing to do with his room. I'm not sure about his asthma, though. That's a tough nut to crack. I know that when he runs, and he runs a lot more, after a few minutes of excertion he will cough...I do know that when he's sick from now on, I will make sure to give him his nebulizer, only because I want his lungs to work at full capacity so he can cough up whatever it is...bronchitis is bad, especially for small children, and pneumona is worse.



So that's a week, plus some review from the previous week. I hope everything is well with you, and gets better.